kudaronggeng

Selamat Ulang Tahun

2011-07-12T10:00:00.000-07:00

Usia 30 tahun itu kalau direnung ke belakang terlalu panjang, renung ke hadapan terlalu singkat.

Khidmat Pesanan Ringkas buat Chairil Anwar

2011-07-12T09:56:00.000-07:00

'Mungkin betul kata kau Chairil,
aku termasuk dalam golongan yang perlukan ideaslime untuk teruskan perjalanan'

dan Chairil membalas,

'Kalau I dengar you sebut nak rumah macam kat Habitat tu, i akan lempang muka you'

5.00pm-6.30pm Daily;

2011-03-13T10:15:00.000-07:00

Hobi kebanyakan warga suami Kuala Lumpur ialah duduk lama-lama minum kopi mahal di ruang-ruang al fresco sambil melihat atas bawah setiap gadis yang lalu lalang, dengan lagak bujang.

Pagi Ahad yang Damai;

2011-03-13T10:06:00.000-07:00

Duhai Teruna-teruna (Muda) Bergetah, Gadis-gadis Montok menyeru merdu......

..
....

Dan tiada yang menyahut.

sigh.

...sigh

2011-02-11T06:57:00.000-08:00

Losing and Iphone 4 is like losing a good man to another woman.
No one is ever gonna return them back.

But like all good men, the Iphone 4 is..replacable.

:)

Hari Buruh

2010-09-20T05:43:00.001-07:00

Date: 1 May
Venue: An architect's office

Boss: Why do we keep on working like this?
R.Isa: Well Boss, we can be delusional and call it commitment. Or we can just admit that we are corporate slaves with poor time management.

I think i'm getting used to this corporate slavery.

legendary words of One who was once so dear; 'I know what I want. I want both. I can handle both'.

2010-09-20T05:39:00.000-07:00

yes young man,
you can even marry four.
but that doesn't mean you'll be happy.

Never Say Goodbye

2010-08-19T09:29:00.000-07:00

Vladimir of Bolivia:

the vegetarian,
the ageless artist,
the spiritual one who belongs to all religion but at the same time belongs to none.

the yoga practitioner,
the philosophical couch surfer,
the one who hates being bounded to a place by non-responsive embassy officers and ridiculous visa regulations.

the liberated traveler,
the hippie story teller,
the loyal companion who constantly orders teh ais at the mamak.

his home is planet earth, his roof the sky and his bed the ground

he leaves for a summer life in Brisbane, and will probably disappear from my life with time.

"I don’t know about your destination, but we both know what makes life interesting is the journey. And I am grateful to be a part of yours"

And yes, Everyday is Great. I’ll always have you to remind me that.

Smelly Mr. Photographer

2010-08-19T09:23:00.000-07:00

Rian Isa : "Have we met before? Because your smell is extremely familiar. But then, maybe it’s just your Marlboro breath"

Bersiar-siar di aras bawah gedung ISETAN The Gardens.

2010-08-19T09:13:00.000-07:00

Haruman parfum berjenama menusuk tajam.
Teruna Muda Bergetah, juga bekas teman lelaki yang kian metrosexual ingin membeli sebotol.

Rian Isa sniffs a familiar smell : "This one smells so good. I’ve actually gone out with a guy who wears this"

Teruna Muda Bergetah : "That would be me, you idiot"

Hehe.

Yes, I am a dumb dumb like that.

songwriting attempt number 1

2010-08-04T09:15:00.000-07:00

your guy can be a charmer
but you know it's got to be over
when he says "honey, i'll call you when i'm sober"

and he never makes that call

Parting is Such Sweet Sorrow

2010-08-03T17:35:00.000-07:00

singing

Now the time has come to leave you

One more time, let me kiss you

Then close your eyes and i'll be on my way

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z3JWFklREK8

feels like i'm heading towards armageddon

Mati adalah Benar

2010-04-03T21:40:00.000-07:00

Menatap wajahnya yang terbaring menunggu Jibrail tanpa sedu,

yang terlintas hanya, mampukah aku?

Revisiting some Pelzme Love Philosophy

2010-04-02T21:04:00.000-07:00

Love is the reason i took time during the busiest week of the semester to try to communicate with someone who sacrificed me and gave up ever talking to me again at the behest of some person i have never met or had any contact with.

Love is the reason i understood and didn't make things more difficult for that person than they already were. Love is the reason i would do the same thing again and would take time away from any night if i thought i could make that person feel even a little bit better.

Now maybe you can write that off as the optimistic ideals of some young, naive, immature, or dumb boy and write the part off yourself that agrees with that boy
but, if you go down that road, i can't follow you.

Much Love, Much Love.

Revisiting that Note to that 21 year old

2010-03-30T12:24:00.000-07:00

Tuesday, October 30, 2007
Dear 21 year old who says I don't act my age.

Here's what's in for you - 6 years ahead.

False Promises
Unreachable Dreams
Killer Heartaches
Numb lovers
Empty Hours
Haunting Regrets

Life is beautiful. Enjoy.

2 1/2 years later:

Dear 21 year old (now 23 1/2) who said I don't act my age.

Please shoot yourself at 29

Mr. Singh on bribing a goverment officer;

2009-11-28T04:25:00.000-08:00

"Malaysia was a very good country. Then came the Chinese businessmen and they screwed it all"

Kata Encik Arslan kepada Saya:

2009-09-27T06:50:00.000-07:00

Yang Baik itu datang dari Tuhan
Yang Buruk itu datang dari Kerajaan

;)

Lelaki yang telurnya mudah teransang mencari Perempuan Peransang Batin.

2009-09-23T10:00:00.000-07:00

Sekali.
Dua kali.
Tiga kali.
Berulang kali.

Satu perempuan.
Dua perempuan.
Tiga perempuan.
Pelbagai perempuan.

Ahh..
Lelaki yang telurnya mudah teransang merupakan semua lelaki.

Dia itu Orang Terbuang

2009-09-23T09:13:00.001-07:00

Apalah nasib orang dibuang,
Tiada lagi dibelai sayang,
Dilenyek sepi, sayu sendiri,
Niat nak mati, tak mati-mati,
Teruslah hidup separuh hati,
Serik batin tanggung sendiri.

Tiga Satu Bulan Lapan Lima Puluh Tujuh

2009-08-31T00:17:00.000-07:00

Memetik sajak 1 baris tulisan Sabri Yunus bertajuk Merdeka;

'Tuhan sebenarnya tidak mahu kita Merdeka'

Kata Korwinn of an Unknown Location;

2009-08-11T08:03:00.000-07:00

'You meet really great people at the wrong times in your life or you meet them at the right times.'

That's it. It's a coin flip.

My Morning sms to God

2009-08-05T11:19:00.001-07:00

Dear God, Why do I have to Work?

and He replied 'Sorry Wrong Number'

Happy Birthday To Me!

2009-07-21T01:23:00.000-07:00

You know you're good at 29 when your dad comes into your room in the morning and says

"Happy Birthday Sayang. I can't believe you're already 26.kekeke."

Love you Ayah. Now I know where I got that sense of humor.

Muah.

God gives what is best for you..

2009-06-15T01:36:00.000-07:00

..and you just have to live with it even if it is the one thing you don't ever want.

no one really ever wants what is best for them i guess.

we all want what we think we can't have.

Tempiak hati kecil ku dari banjaran Gunung Soffeh;

2009-05-18T22:33:00.000-07:00

' Is this all, Esfahan? Could this be all, Dunia?

tajam hantaran pesanan ringkas Chairil Anwar: YES. THIS IS ALL.

Sial. Bila pulak engkau jadi Dunia, En. Chairil?

Sabtu lalu aku menonton filem hindi di tv3 di mana penyangaknya bermadah kepada lawannya yang penyangak juga;

2009-05-05T02:40:00.000-07:00

Mujurlah aku curang, sayang...

Mujurlah aku curang, sayang...

Hanya anjing yang setia.

va va va

Added Value: Kenalan munggil berdarah Monggolia cuba menyelami nilai dirinya di Devi’s Bangsar.

2009-03-28T05:38:00.000-07:00

“I find it hard to casual-date nowdays. It is hard for girls not to fall flat for me because I seem to fit the Husband Material stereotype”

“And what makes one Husband Material?”

“I got a decent job, a car, a house and insurance (yes, not everyone can afford that). At this stage of my life, girls seem to think I’ve made it, hence, husband potential. By our second date, they demand more than I am willing to submit. All I want to do is just go out and meet people”

I slowly sip my teh o ais.

Great.
My job is a joke, I got no car (I can’t even drive), I still live with my parents and I have no insurance (or savings for that matter).

I am not Wife Material?

Funny.

Bertemu sahabat lama; American Sabahan yang fasih bahasa Semenanjung, dan subjek ‘The Malay Dilemma’ hadir dalam diskusi.

2009-02-24T20:38:00.000-08:00

“Do you think we’re still in a dilemma?”

“I don’t know...are we Malays? “

hi hi hi hi

I guess we are still in a dilemma of some sort.
Yes Melayus, laugh all issues away

My two cents worth:

2009-02-12T06:24:00.000-08:00

Always trust your instincts.

They are NEVER wrong.

Kehadapan Kenalan Baruku yang katanya Hanya Mahukan Gadis Melayu,

2009-02-03T04:37:00.000-08:00

Why limit your lifetime happiness to a specific group of people?

What if the love of your life (read: your soul mate) is some Venezuelan, African, Chinese chick (who cares?) and the reason you continue living in miserable lonely emptiness is solely because you refuse to see beyond skin colour?

Why build unnecessary boundaries?

Yang Amir bertanya kepada Arkitek Rian.Isa, “Where is the most beautiful house?”

2009-02-02T06:29:00.000-08:00

Dan jarang-jarang sekali aku menjawab jujur seperti ini,

"It’s the one where the people living in it are extremely happy together. And sadly, that is actually quite a rare find."

It's never really about the design.

Kuala Lumpur Contradicts

2009-01-31T20:05:00.000-08:00

Kuala Lumpur is so SMALL.
You end up meeting everybody who knows everybody you know.

and yet at the same time it seems so BIG.
Coz that one person you search for, you don't seem to bump into.

Happy Birthday Kuala Lumpur.

Saya Saaaaaaayaaang KL

Love Hurts, Scars, Ruins, Marks.

2009-01-19T01:39:00.000-08:00

"Give me ONE reason to stay"

You love me.

"And how would you know that?"

Coz it hurts you too.

Life is Simple, make it Simpler

2009-01-16T07:50:00.000-08:00

I met an amazing person in 2008, whose pursuit for pure simplicity in life shook my belief system to its very core.

Too bad he’s dead.

Amin.

Always 25 minutes too late.

Mamat Petronas di hujung talian; "Hari ini I cam malas nak ngadap KL"

2009-01-05T08:59:00.000-08:00

Kuala Lumpur kan Kiblat beb.

"Kiblat untuk perempuan yang macam you"

Heh. Tapi bukan I yang makan gaji kat 'Mekah' yang itu.

pagi aku ke vitya untuk sarapan dan lebih penting, akses wi-fi percuma.

2009-01-04T05:48:00.000-08:00

morning khanna, order biasa.

The ground beneath her feet aku letak di meja.

Khanna: Oh you’re reading Salman Rushdie.

Rian: Yeah.

Khanna: He is a very good writer. I’ve read all his books. Very good. brilliant.

Rian: Yeah.. he is...(smile)

Khanna senyum lebar dan hidangkan aku tose masala dan teh o ais ke meja.

2 minggu lagi, Khanna balik ke Chennai.

Mamak Vitya pun ada masa nak baca.

Lelaki itu tidak lagi Mahu...

2009-01-02T07:50:00.000-08:00

i love you babe..

i just do :)

too bad huh?

“What is a Marriage to you?” “Sacred” (because this answer is what’s expected and very often repeated)

2008-12-25T07:12:00.000-08:00

Tying the knot does not automatically make you holy. It does not permit you to erase your sins or rewrite your past.

Married, you are not a new or renewed man. You are by all means the same exact person playing a totally different game.

Marriage is a bond - will tie you the ground, or rather to another person’s hip for a lifetime.

You do not marry because you need to be in control of situations, or break free from the grasp of your parents, or because you simply have to because really, what else is there to do?

Marriage means working it out. It ensures the other one never leaves you, and if that one person decides to, you have all the right to make it one hell of a time to go through.

Marriage is settling down with someone because seriously, once your hairline and metabolism rate decreases, who else would wanna do you?

Hell, if you were a George Clooney, you’d stay single as long as you can.

Si Pengemis mengaduh perit kepada Malaikatnya “be.b..bengisnya takdirrr…”

2008-12-24T08:47:00.000-08:00

“Everything will be o.k”

What is o.k? just alive is also o.k.

“Then settle for alive.”

italian master designer enzo mari on his heart.

2008-12-19T02:15:00.000-08:00

Hikayat si Ratna yang Tidak Seberapa

2008-12-13T09:13:00.001-08:00

Kurang sedikit tiga dekad panjang umurnya, dia memilih untuk lena. Tidur kerana tidak mahu lupa, juga malas hidup dalam jaga.

Fikirnya kalau hidup ini umpama mimpi, teruslah dia dibuai syahdu. Tidak kusut kilau dunia, tidak sesak nyawa dengan adab manusia. Mimpi elok; Suralayanya. Mimpi buruk; masygul sendiri.

Di atas katilnya dia menelangkung, menelangkup, mengereng, mengerang. Di situ lah dia menyorok bawah cengkerang. Biar jiwanya meratap, mengilai dalam sedu, sebak tawanya, tiada siapa perlu tahu.

Dia beradu tidak perlu dengar bingit celoteh orang-orang yang mahu peduli. Bebas gerak geri, bebas akal dan hati.

Dan kalau Suri itu maksudnya Puteri, di katil itu dialah Permai-Suri.

Puteri kepada wilayah Permai, lena dalam damai.

“Tidurlah wahai Permaisuri, pejam mata…”

Permaisuri tidur sepanjang riwayatnya.

Zzz..

*Tuanku tidur dengan gundik-gundiknya.

"One thing good in your life - you've got me. Even I don't have me."

2008-12-05T06:47:00.000-08:00

True, I am blessed with many great friends. So great that I don’t deserve them.

I must have done something right to have all of you.

I can’t be that bad at all.

Karma is crap invented by bitter sour-grapes who just want to feel better about themselves and refuse to let others live true to their conscience.

2008-12-05T06:24:00.000-08:00

Life is a journey: Everyone is bound to experience heartache, everyone will eventually find themselves hurting others, we’ll all regret, and always always, we’ll find ourselves at the losing end.

Happiness happens to everyone too. No sour- grape can take that away from us, right babe?.

Lunch Anecdotes: Cozy House with Two Long Lost Friends

2008-11-18T03:42:00.000-08:00

"I have major commitment issues. I find it hard to commit to a 10 year car loan, let alone a life time relationship."

"Babe, you just compared a relationship to buying a car"

"Well, i did say my issues are MAJOR"

Kuala Lumpur

2008-11-16T21:26:00.000-08:00

becak lumpurmu ku salut ke muka,
takkan tambah cantik di wajah.

becak lumpurmu ku tempek ke dada,
takkan ada tambah bidangnya.

becak lumpurmu ku kesatkan tubuh
takkan hilang kudis sengsara.

bila aku pulang ke tanah,
becak lumpur, kau terimalah.
kau terimakah?

Daily Starter Kit - Contents of My Aldo Bag:

2008-11-16T21:23:00.000-08:00

1. my Wallet
2. my Ipod
3. my Umbrella
4. my Handphone

Pantun Tiga baris untuk saudara Chairil Anwar

2008-11-16T07:00:00.001-08:00

Datang Subuh aku termenung,
Datang ngantuk aku merenung,
Nasib badan hati yang tanggung.

jawab, jangan tak jawab :P

Ceritalah Lagi 1

2008-11-09T03:38:00.000-08:00

In most stories I am the other woman, the boyfriend snatcher, the selfish insensitive girlfriend who never thinks about you, the bitch who broke your heart, the friend who takes you for granted, the lover who seems to only want to hurt you, the slut who uses you, the girl who takes too much of your precious time, the one you have to drive around.

In one story I am just a girl who makes mistakes in pursuit of answers. Often, I am just misunderstood.

First Faithful Attempt : Tragic Ending

2008-11-07T10:32:00.000-08:00

How ex-cheaters can go wrong :

They focus too much on being loyal, they forget other aspects of the relationship.

How they sorta got it right before:
Cheater's conscience drove them to go all out to make up to their partners (boy, they sure never saw it coming)

Lesson Learnt : I treat my guys way better when I cheat on them :)

Nights are Lonely, Days are so Sad..

2008-11-06T09:00:00.000-08:00

Mornings are extremely empty.

I need a fix. This is bad.

Are we Man-Addicts?

2008-11-05T07:59:00.001-08:00

This adrenalin rush, this high in my brain, this stupid smile on my face, surely it has nothing to do with the fact that he just asked for my number?

Bring it on honey! Let the games begin!

kalau dah jodoh tak ke mana

2008-11-04T11:26:00.000-08:00

Sunday, November 4, 2007

A relationship is all about location, location, location...no?

Oh, and mutual attraction of course.

I can see why it'll never work out for me. har har.

I was not so young, but definitely stupid

2008-11-04T09:23:00.000-08:00

Yes, it is ideal to commit yourself to one man for the rest of your life.

But to leave all these beautiful, good looking men would be a waste of opportunities.

What in the world was I thinking????

I am so back in the market!! yeeeeeehaaaaaaaa!

News from Break-Up Rehab: It is hard to kick off a habit, even when you're dying to quit

2008-11-03T20:18:00.000-08:00

This grieving wholesomeness; the self realization of knowing that you suck for repeating the same mistake over and over again, the frustration of knowing that you're always too late, the self denial that it is now all up to fate, the continuous praying for a second chance, the floating you feel hoping it is all a bad dream, the emptiness you feel inside for sabotaging probably one of the best thing that has ever crossed by..REMAINS.

The mind takes a week to compute a break up. All you need is Itunes' divine intervention of playing The Shin’s A Call to Apathy/Gone for Good on your music list to finally get it.

I suck. I get it.

I actually don't mind your awful temper, your insecurities and your yearning for loneliness. But I get it.

To Err is Human, I loved you like Hell. Yes, I GET IT.

The Shin's 'A Call to Apathy' at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x_BrPqn2_1Q

I fucking get it.

Mungkin ada yang geleng kepala, yang terbeliak menahan takjub, yang ketawa tak mau percaya.

2008-09-28T11:54:00.000-07:00

Harap maaf rakan perantau sekalian, simpan saja sebak sedu.

Yang pasti Isatopia kini super duper exclusive.

Pintu kami kini hanya untuk lelaki itu.

Lelaki yang harapnya masih mahu...

Posted by rian.isa at 11:54 AM

My Friends say the Darnest Things to Comfort Me

2008-09-23T13:16:00.000-07:00

“Let me tell you something that every girl should know. Men are STUPID. They think they are so smart. But they are not"
: that's from one who's kept her man in wraps for nearly a decade.

“Forget loyalty.. you should be loyal only when you’re married"
: that's from a happily married lady.

" I think you should try to go out with a professional"
: that's from one who's never dated.

"Kalau u tak nak laki, I boleh supply kan you pengkid"
: that's from one who claims she is very much straight.

"Im sorry for you but I am in love"
: and that's from one who is still optimistic.

Telegram untuk Chairil Anwar

2008-09-21T21:43:00.000-07:00

Pavarti space has space fallen space from space grace stop

Berkorban apa saja (like the song)

2008-05-28T12:24:00.000-07:00

Hadirin sekalian, hakikatnya untuk membuktikan cinta anda pada si dia amat mendalam, yang berikut harus dilepaskan.

1. Empunya diri.

Hari korban perempuan ialah hari mereka lesu menyerah kepada lelaki.

Saya dengan rela hatinya mintak jadi korban hari hari.

Lesu siut…heheh ;)

To Cheat or Not to Cheat, Now that is the Question.

2008-04-21T13:33:00.000-07:00

It’s been revealed to me that for humans, happiness is a state of being that is just too much too handle. The idea of supreme happiness scares the shit out of everyone. (Its ideal concept however, is why we are convinced that it is what life is meant to pursue.)

The easiest way out is to hurt ourselves. So we cheat. We cheat on our partners, we cheat on our friends, we cheat on our beliefs.

We cheat, not because we are unhappy with the situation or whatever relationship we are having, but because it is scarily perfect. So perfect that we find the need to double check with someone/something else. (Sadly, most of the time, it ends up at someone else’s expense).

Deny. Deny you are cheating. By all means, justify all you can that you are not cheating. Like it or not, that is just really your guilt talking.

As someone who has repeatedly cheated I say “You have to hurt a little to enjoy the living"

Shaggy sings in the background "It wasn't me"

Quiet dinner at the terrace. He smiles and says “this is… just nice”. "I hope it really is". Dan aku tenung bulan mengambang di Changkat Bukit Bintang

2008-04-21T13:10:00.001-07:00

Lelaki-lelaki terus silih berganti. Mungkin aku dah tak naik heran?

Quiet dinner at the terrace. He smiles and says “this is… just nice”. "I hope it really is". Dan aku tenung bulan mengambang di Changkat Bukit Bintang

2008-04-21T13:10:00.000-07:00

Lelaki-lelaki terus silih berganti. Mungkin aku dah tak naik heran?

The Heart Wants What it Wants

2008-04-17T14:29:00.000-07:00

Lelaki itu mahu tahu hidup yang bagaimana yang aku mahu
Hidup yang tanpa noktah (.)
Cuma ada comma (,) colon (:) dan semi-colon (;)
Kalau perlu pun ada titik biarlah ia titik-titik yang berterusan (........), tanda nanti ada cerita sambungan

Lelaki itu mahu tahu sampai bila aku mahu hidup yang sebegitu
Sampai noktah hilang makna
Sampai perkataan ‘tamat’ tidak lagi ada

Lelaki itu mahukan aku.............................(bersambung)

;)

I had lunch with a friend of 15 years last Friday and the first thing he said was “At least respect la that it’s Friday, wear la baju kurung”.

2008-03-18T13:25:00.000-07:00

Tuesday, March 18, 2008

My new t-shirt says:
I don’t just go to mosque and become a Malay Muslim only on Fridays.

I had lunch with a friend of 15 years last Friday and the first thing he said was “At least respect la that it’s Friday, wear la baju kurung”.

2008-03-18T08:37:00.000-07:00

Tuesday, March 18, 2008

My new t-shirt says:
I don’t just go to mosque and become a Malay Muslim only on Fridays.
Posted by rian.isa at 1:25 PM

Sahabatku Chairil Anwar, hari ini aku baca terjemahan puisi idolamu Rumi dan aku teringat yang aku selalunya tak ingat.

2008-03-08T11:46:00.000-08:00

Kembali Pada Tuhan : Jalaluddin Rumi
Jika engkau belum mempunyai ilmu, hanyalah prasangka,
maka milikilah prasangka yang baik tentang Tuhan.

Begitulah caranya!

Jika engkau hanya mampu merangkak,
maka merangkaklah kepadaNya!

Jika engkau belum mampu berdoa dengan khusyuk,
maka tetaplah persembahkan doamu
yang kering, munafik dan tanpa keyakinan;
kerana Tuhan, dengan rahmatNya
akan tetap menerima mata wang palsumu!

Jika engkau masih mempunyai
seratus keraguan mengenai Tuhan,
maka kurangilah menjadi sembilan puluh sembilan saja.

Begitulah caranya!

Wahai pejalan!
Biarpun telah seratus kali engkau ingkar janji,
ayuhlah datang, dan datanglah lagi!

Kerana Tuhan telah berfirman:
“Ketika engkau melambung ke angkasa
ataupun terpuruk ke dalam jurang,
ingatlah kepadaKu,
kerana Akulah jalan itu.”

Giving you reasons to stay. Let’s start with: 1. I bring you yummy donuts

2008-02-27T12:51:00.000-08:00

Scene 22 Take 1: Girl decides he is all worth it and gives her last try. She shows up at his 3.5mx10m office lobby and somehow manages to spot him in the crowd. She gives him her brightest smile and hands him a box of donuts.

Camera rolling.

Scene 25 Take 1: She walks away, head low, towards the dim lighted highway. Background music The Fray's How to Save a Life.

The end.

Black screen. No running credits.

"The ones who leave are not worth it. It’s the ones who stay who you should care about."

But I tried to stay…??

The Very Buts of Our Lives

2008-02-19T12:04:00.000-08:00

But I really like you But we’ve been friends for 15 years But your fiance annoys the hell out of me But we were so happy But it’s just not meant to be But you’re just not my type But I’m broke But you’re fat But the heart wants what it wants But I’m in love with you But it was not real But I'm not in love with you But I didn’t mean to hurt you But what if But who cares But I never really loved you anyway But you're an asshole nevertheless yeah But no But I still love you But it takes two But i need my muse back But you're happy..(to be continued)

The Risk of Never Knowing

2008-02-18T08:44:00.000-08:00

Asam after asam (I don’t do nicotine, so I try to kill myself with salt instead) in front of the t.v watching The Many Lovers of Marilyn Monroe, I realize that ending a fling, although it doesn’t turn you suicidal, places you in an empty slow motion space – bright white lights all around.

While it may be worth it to beg your way back into that other person’s heart, one must remember that there is always a catch. This time around (if that second chance actually happens), it has to be for real.

So,

Off we go, back to the Land of Unsettled Souls

This one is for Keri who gets it, everytime :)

2008-01-25T12:02:00.000-08:00

About my heart, yes, pieces by pieces are being left in several places.
At one point, there will none left and by then, I can proudly self proclaim myself as the Heartless Bitch.

p/s: dark humor, sitcom humor or just plain weird sense of humor?

Oh, and I was told that for formality sake, on my namecard, they'll spell it as B.Arch.

Kuala Lumpur's Dating Game : Marriage Proposals

2008-01-20T09:54:00.000-08:00

Sunday, January 20, 2008

Top most cunning and trickiest to answer to so far:

"If you marry me, you'll get a supplementary credit card...:)"

Rian. Isa: Tempting dear, but NO (= not yet :).

Kuala Lumpur's Dating Game : Food is the way to the Heart

2008-01-19T12:57:00.000-08:00

Godaan Jantan yang buat kami goyah bukanlah godaan berahi asmara, godaan harum mandian bunga, godaan romantis kata-kata manis ataupun godaan ringgit material melangit.

Godaan Jantan yang buat kami lemah ialah godaan enak lauk pauk di ceruk-ceruk restoran fancy.

Sayugia diingatkan: Makhluk yang sentiasa kalah pada huluran makanan hanyalah Si Anjing Penjaga Rumah - disogok Si Pencuri yang hanya ingin senang lepas pagar tanpa bingit bising Si Anjing menyalak (ia hanya tau menyalak).

Si Anjing derita tulang beracun. Si Pencuri masuk ke rumah tanpa halangan.

Si Perempuan jadi gemuk. Si Jantan mendapat hati perempuan.

***
I guess lunch and dinner dates would make me a fat female dog but hey, tell this bitch what she doesn’t know already.

Give me One reason to stay here and I’ll turn right back around

2008-01-13T06:38:00.000-08:00

It's hard when you have an experience that totally changes your ideas/priorities and then you come back to find everyone at home just deeper into their old grooves. Can be very lonely. So he says.

It couldn’t be that bad. I’ll always be here for you. We’re gonna grow old together. So he says.

I think you expect too much from life, from your friends, from this place. Try not to think too much, take it as it is. So he says.

And with that I try to enjoy the nothingness. Only to find myself today bored to death. So bored that I could die at this exact moment, in this exact position and it wouldn’t matter. Coz nothing awaits.

Life is a dish of curry, you only have to decide which type to eat.

2007-12-27T12:59:00.000-08:00

Kalau hidup semangkuk kari, kenapa harus kari kau sejenis sedangkan berahi kari kambing, kari daging, kari ayam, kari ikan bahkan maggie kari hidangan kami boleh kau hirup sekali jalan?

‘I rasa I tak leh kot. I tak faham camne you boleh keluar ngan lelaki yang naik motor’ she said ; ciggie in her right hand, smirk on her face.

2007-12-16T07:26:00.000-08:00

Pasal you tak faham wahai perempuan, yang statement-statement macam tu tak akan buat you nampak lebih taraf, lebih bagus, lebih cantik atau lebih cerdik. Sentimen elitist you tak akan buat I lebih kagum, lebih kecil, lebih jalang atau lebih kurang. Pasal perempuan ada berjenis-jenis – dan I masuk jenis yang sayangkan orang bukannya kenderaan. Dan lelaki bermotor yang you takkan date itu beli motor itu dengan duitnya sendiri pada umur 17 tahun. Apa yang kita berdua ada pada umur 17 kalau bukan hanya tetek?

And that is what I would have said if it wasn’t for the fact that I couldn’t get rid of her out of my life and my friend is totally in love with her. Jadi I cuba untuk beradab.

'I memang suka gila naik motor' I said; middle finger under the table, big smile on my face.

Awek rempit bebas berpeleseran.

Babi

2007-11-24T09:50:00.000-08:00

Babi is when you spot your cinta gagal and he still looks like the one you'd wanna screw over and over.

one month of architecture and out comes my dark circles and 2 wrinkle lines

2007-11-22T10:12:00.000-08:00

damn you architecture for making me age.
damn you autocad for taking away the fun from drawing - i just end up monitor staring.
damn you boss for lying to the client - telling him that his design is done when there's actually none.
damn you anti-wrinkle cream for failing to work.
damn you cute kl guys. where the hell are you all hiding?
damn you youthfulness...why must you be leaving?

100th entry : today I wore yellow

2007-11-10T09:03:00.000-08:00

Today was spectacular.

I stood up for what i believe in - my yellow undies as symbolic evidence. Couldn't find any other yellow accessories to wear, but I was there.

In my favourite Mets blue T, amidst a swarm of yellow - I say 'what you wear is simply an outer layer, what's underneath is what matters - are you daring enough to reveal that?

to yellow under-garmented friends who stayed away - the silent majority - power to our people yeah?.

Dear 21 year old who says I don't act my age.

2007-10-30T10:13:00.000-07:00

Here's what's in for you - 6 years ahead.

False Promises
Unreachable Dreams
Killer Heartaches
Numb lovers
Empty Hours
Haunting Regrets

Life is beautiful. Enjoy.

I love Britney Spears

2007-10-21T09:58:00.000-07:00

"So how long do you think before your adolescent antics expires its cuteness appeal?"

"Hit me baby several times!"

:)

Where did I go wrong? I am losing my country.

2007-10-16T12:51:00.000-07:00

Historic buildings are being demolished and Green Areas are being replaced by high-end residential. My school is now a huge shopping mall and my village has now been split into two by an 8-lane highway. I am deeply disturbed, but there is nothing I can do about it. So life goes on as usual in Kuala Lumpur - frustrated and confused. At least the food is still good.

Coming up - Penang Twin Towers and a Malacca Eye. Soon, there will be a set of twin towers and a Ferris Wheel in every Malaysian city. Perhaps by then we'd see how awful our roofscapes are, and how the world makes a little more sense seen from a worm's eye view.

Let's all lie down on the ground and start breathing, open our eyes and whisper slowly:

'Mayors of Malaysia, are your cities advanced?'

Google It

2007-10-14T09:15:00.000-07:00

Google Search : What am I suppose to do with my life?
Google Books Result: Ask the Right Questions.

He the Setan Gondol and She the Hati Legam

2007-10-11T11:47:00.000-07:00

So She’s figured out why She’s so afraid of Him.

He is the only one who is able to do to her what She does to others.

Seduce. Manipulate. Break.

They’re both dead-eyed and smug-faced.

The Dating Game

2007-10-10T11:03:00.000-07:00

I'm not playing hard to get. I've lost my dating-drive. So quit asking me out.

First Date No-Nos

2007-10-04T10:05:00.000-07:00

"So do you want to have kids?"

That was too soon babe, too soon...i'm going, going...GONE.

It's been Two Weeks

2007-09-30T13:41:00.000-07:00

Sunday, September 30, 2007

So where are all the cute guys of Kuala Lumpur?

That one is engaged..

That one is married..

That one is gay...

and hmm...that one is .. just my imagination.

The Melayu-Chick Dilemma

2007-09-29T15:27:00.000-07:00

Can you actually imagine living a life with someone who does not appreciate the smell of Belacan?
Why is it that we try so hard to run away from being a stereotyped Melayu, but in the end that is all what we really want to be?

Most Melayu Men are Bastards.
So we date the non-bastards instead, but shamelessly wish they turn out to become more Melayu than the Bastard-Melayus.

Are Melayu-Chicks merely tools of the Melayunisation Movement?
I quote my first boyfriend, 6 years after that 1 month relationship, “I’m glad things didn’t work out for us. I really love Bah Kut Teh (Pork Bone Tea)”.

Pasaramakota

2007-09-25T09:03:00.000-07:00

"Tapi ni Bus Stand Klang?"

"Belah kanan Bus Stand Klang. Belah kiri, bawah stesen Pasar Seni, kita panggil pasaramakota. Bus U72, tunggu kat tiang tu."

"Tapi tu bas U73, berhenti belah kanan...kira dia berhenti kat Bus Stand Klang la."

"Itu tak cukup tempat nak berhenti, drebar kena berhenti situ la."

"Kira Bus Stand Klang dengan Pasaramakota tu tempat sama la.."

"Lain. Pasaramakota, belah kiri. Awak naik bas U72, bayar Rm2, boleh pakai tiket satu hari."

"Tapi saya ada RM1 je. Saya nak pergi satu hala je, naik satu bas. RM 1 la patutnya."

"RM2. Sekarang semua bas kompeni ni, tiket RM2, boleh pakai sampai pukul 11.30mlm."

"Ye ke? Alamak. Bas boleh tunggu saya kejap tak bang? Saya pergi kedai tu tukar duit. Duit kecik saya ada RM1 je."

"Naik je lah. Takyah la bayar. Bulan puasa ni, penat aku nak layan kau. Lain kali nak naik bas, bawak duit kecik."

"Heee.."

Kuala Lumpur, I AM BACK!

Hitam Manis Pandang Tak Jemu

2007-09-25T08:56:00.000-07:00

"Wah, lu sudah balik ah? Banyak hitam la lu sekarang!"

"Aiyo, sudah lama tak nampak. Mana pergi? Manyak hitam?!"

"When did you get the tan?"

"Fuiyo, sudah kurus woo..sana tada makan ka? Tapi lu sudah sikit hitam la dari dulu.."

SAYA COKLAT LA!!!!!!

Hari ini mungkin Sejarah

2007-08-17T00:04:00.000-07:00

2.30 petang :

Buat pertama kalinya aku ditemuramah sebagai seorang preservationist oleh reporter dari Charleston City Paper.

Buat pertama kalinya aku rasa aku suka bertemu dan beramah mesra.

Buat pertama kalinya aku sedar bahawa ada kali pertama untuk setiap perkara.

another one getting married :P

2007-08-13T21:02:00.000-07:00

ok. I am really happy that my beloved ones are getting hitched. But can't you guys wait for 2-3 months, for me to come back.. and witness your special moment? I nak makan nasik minyak gak....

10.56pm

2007-08-08T22:55:00.000-07:00

Now that I'm older, dancing to Footloose in front of the mirror, in the middle of the night, has never felt better.

Let's dance!

*doing flashdance next and then dirty dancing. muahas.

My Bestfriend's Wedding (II)

2007-08-07T21:10:00.000-07:00

And yes, I've watched that movie thousand of times and I know that when you love someone you just say it, otherwise the moment... passes you by. I just forgot about it.

But I still remember that chasing a guy who doesn't love me will make me fungus. And that would be degrading.

See friends, I'm getting there...:)

I know, I know...you guys are fed up of me already..:P

2007-08-06T05:48:00.000-07:00

Yes, I know that my miserable state has been driving you guys up the wall. I'm getting there ok..It's not that I'm not trying.

I must admit, hebat gak penangan si mangkuk ni. The only other person that I know of, who's had this much impact on other people is...let me see..

hmm...

ME!

muahahahahahahhahahahahaaha!

Yes, Azarimy, sometimes I am so full of my self. But I make myself happy.

Joe anak Ropi must be laughing his head off right now :P

And yes, God does have a great sense of humour.

Oh well.

Riwayat Badut-badut Sedunia

2007-08-05T12:09:00.000-07:00

Si Badut membuat penonton ketawa.

Pakaiannya kolot, kepalanya botak, hidungnya bulat merah. Penonton ketawa kerana rupanya hodoh. Si Badut jatuh tergolek, penonton terkekek. Anak-anak kecil membaling batu, Si Badut mengaduh sakit. Penonton terus bersorak. Rejaman batu semakin kasar, si Badut menangis mintak berhenti, penonton mengilai mahu lagi. Penonton menjerit suka, bukankah dia Si Badut yang akan bangun bergelak ketawa di hujung persembahan? Sekarang rejaman kayu tajam bertubi-tubi. Tak cukup dengan itu, ditambah parang, tonjak di kiri, depan, belakang. Si Badut merayu, mintak simpati. Penonton buat bodoh tak faham, mereka terus ketawa lagi. Dan akhirnya Si Badut mati. Dan mayatnya di sangkut di pintu gerbang. Setiap kali orang lalu lalang, atau ada pelawat yang datang, mereka ketawa lagi dan lagi. Kerana celoreng merah ketawa gembira di sekitar dagu dan pipi Si Badut, masih lekat di muka tengkoraknya.

Sampai ke mati, Si Badut membuat penonton ketawa.

Mari ke mari ke Isatopia Sayang…

2007-08-05T08:21:00.000-07:00

Isatopia adalah untuk jantan-jantan yang mahu bingung dan tak takut untuk gila. Siang malam kami hidangkan kilau dunia. Tari menari bahagia supaya mereka lupa apa yang nyata, sampai jiwa mabuk dengan asmara. Dunia ini dunia kayangan, tapi gelekan gadis-gadis bergetah bukan bayangan. Pinggul-pinggul kami adalah harapan berahi para jantan.

Di Isatopia kami goda mereka ke ceruk-ceruk indah, bermandikan curahan kasih terpendam, dibelai gemalai bisikan ayat-ayat pengasih Tajul Mulok. Jiwa mereka kami suapkan dengan gelora, kami sedut semua resah duka. Di sini hidup adalah bebas tidak bersyarat. Mereka hanya mampu terbaring, ternganga, diam tidak percaya sampai di syurga. Mereka hanya mampu terbaring lega. Kami bukan gadis-gadis rekrut syaitan penggoda. Kami mewakili malaikat yang mahu tawarkan mereka pedoman hidup.

Isatopia boleh mereka tinggalkan pada bila-bila masa. Kami senyum melambai tidak menghalang mereka yang inginkan kepastian. Kami tidak mahu mereka takut dengan gadis-gadis cantik yang pintar memanupulasi di luar sana. Kami biarkan mereka cuba kehidupan yang penuh negosiasi. Kami biarkan mereka percaya jalan keluar mereka bahagia. Gerbang Isatopia tidak pernah tutup. Mudah keluar, mudah kembali. Sekali jiwa menyundal, selamanya mereka sundal. Dunia kami tidak pernah berhenti untuk mereka yang takut dengan imaginasi fantasi. Hiburan kami adalah kisah-kisah perjalanan hidup mereka yang panjang. Hidup kami adalah hiburan mereka yang berpanjangan.

Mari ke mari ke Isatopia…semua pasti takkan kecewa.

Irondanwine, di sini kau super v.i.p.

Azarimy, kau dah kawin. Jangan harap :P

http://www.soyouvebeendumped.com/breakup.html

2007-08-04T21:22:00.000-07:00

"Really, it's not you, I'm just going through a selfish phase..."
"Maybe we have too much in common. We are too much alike."
Ouch.

"I have a lot of growing up to do."
"I really like you, you're a lovely woman and we have great fun - you're just not a long-term prospect."
Double Ouch.

"Sorry, You're not the one".
Ouch.Ouch.Ouch

Website apa la u bagi i ni Botuck?

Tengahari bertemu Tuan Jamie Westendorff

2007-08-04T21:16:00.000-07:00

"My pleasure to meet you. Beautiful smile. My grandfather always said, if Lord created something better on a woman, then he kept it for himself."

We have angels everywhere :)

4 hari 4 malam, 5 sahabat

2007-08-04T00:04:00.000-07:00

In no necessary order :

Beautiful Czar :
"I tido awal semalam pasal tak larat nak layan you."

Bit si Pengembala Hati:
"Dah dia tak angkat, nak buat cam ne. Nak buat cam ne.. Nak buat cam ne..."

Si Katak Puru :
"You kejam la bagi I tengok muka u cam ni time I happy happy. I am in such a good mood and you have to spoil it."

Botuck:
"Nangis je. Sapa yang kata jangan ditangis barang yang lepas tu bodoh."

Azarimy:
"Rian, you’re high. Please go to sleep. I need to go on with my life."

Beautiful Czar to Azarimy (if I'm not mistaken):
"So she’s finally managed to embarrass herself?"

Thanks guys. I know I’ll never hear the last of this. And whatever I said when I was high – I beg you not to repeat to anyone. Kadang-kadang I pun tau malu la..:)

Today I've managed to smile without hurting my cheekbones. I love you people.

aduhai nasibnya yang malang..

2007-08-03T16:56:00.000-07:00

Today she wakes up and realizes that she is no Cynthia, no Yoko and neither is she a Pattie Boyd.
She's just one of those random groupie who believed she conquered the world for one meaningless night.

Matinya Teruna Muda Berbatang Pendek

2007-08-03T12:02:00.000-07:00

Kisah ini semi-fiksyen dan gurauan semata-mata.

Dia mati seorang diri di dalam biliknya yang serupa kolong. Tidak sempat hidup selama Kurt Cobain atau Jimmy Hendrix. Tak sempat hidup lebih lama dari Jesus mereka. Mati umurnya 22, tidaklah setragis mana. Tidaklah OD kemudian tercekik dek muntah sendiri. Mati biasa biasa, mati sifilis akibat makan terlalu banyak daging babi.
Hujung-hujung kehidupan sifilisnya, bila nak kencing amatlah perit. Mata pedih menahan sempit. Hilanglah fungsinya menjadi lelaki. Khayalan porno semuanya sakit kerana satu apa pun tak dapat naik.
Berlapis-lapis jenama Gap disalut, cuba sorokkan badannya yang makin jerangkung aneroxia. Nak makan minum, takut nak buang air. Tak makan minum, takut terkulai. Sepi otaknya. Hmm, apa jadi pada otaknya? Penulis tidaklah sekejam mana, kerana sebenarnya akalnya sangatlah bagus dan hatinya agaklah baik. Sememangnya dia anak orang, adik orang, kekasih orang. Jadi penulis bersimpati walaupun berpendapat dia sebelum ini sepatutnya ada sedikit emphaty untuk orang lain. Walau sengsara sifilis, dia masih boleh bahagia dengan selerak buku-buku Orhan Pamuk di sekitarnya. Nasibnya cuma batangnya pendek, buruk bersifilis dan tak boleh naik. Itu saja.
Oh, come on. I think it’s pretty funny. :P

1 hour later : Fine, it doesn't make me feel any better. Still thinks it's funny though. Susahnya berhati manusia :(